Dear children,
Here is what you need to do:
1. Click on these links to recall stories you have read:
Article 1: http://news.xin.msn.com/en/singapore/article.aspx?cp-documentid=4517909
Article 2: http://www.businessinsider.sg/toddler-babysitters-burglary-2014-6/#.VCd7ovmSwfU
Article 3: http://www.tnp.sg/news/girl-10-stays-calm-during-burglary-her-home
Article 4: http://www.tnp.sg/news/burglar-leaves-phone-crime-scene-calls-ask-it-back
Article 5: http://fox59.com/2014/09/27/home-burglary-suspect-arrested-after-surveillance-video-released-to-public/
To recall the meaning of...
"foiled": http://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/british/foil
"burglary": http://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/british/burglary
2. Find the padlet for your group and share words and phrases you will want to use in your composition (title and pictures). You may use these links to help you:
1) Similes http://paradiseenglishonline.weebly.com/uploads/6/9/3/3/6933398/similes_list_of_as_as.pdf
2) Idioms: http://www.idiomsite.com/
Blue Groups: http://padlet.com/wall/gzof5hx0u9mn
Red Groups: http://padlet.com/wall/edimomyzdoqv
Green Groups: http://padlet.com/wall/fa916zca2n78
3. Log into AsknLearn. Click on "Tools" -> Google App -> Gmail
When you log into your email, you will find an email from me to invite you to open a Google Doc. Open that and start writing your group paragraph(s).
4. Comment on class blog
Group leaders only: Once you are pleased with your group's paragraph, you copy (Ctrl + C) and paste (Ctrl + P) here (your class blog).
5. Read other groups' paragraphs
Give "Two Stars and One Wish" by clicking on "Reply" of other groups' comments
A Burglary that was Foiled
ReplyDeleteA crime scene happened at Yishun shopping mall. The burglar decided to break into the shopping mall to steal some valuables as he was poor and needed money for his family. He then threatened all the shop owners with a kitchen knife that was as shiny as a new pin.
Just at that moment, a passer-by that was singing a tune of a lullaby and when he saw what had happened.He got scared out of his wits ,he quickly fish his handphone out of his pocket and decided to call for the police.In spilt seconds,the police arrived. They took out their guns that were as heavy as an elephant.When the thief saw the police,he ran as fast as his legs could carry him.Even though he is a fast runner,there were too many police,and soon the thief was surrounded and was caught red-handed.
Two stars:
Delete1. very interesting
2. many good words and phrases
One wish:
1.a little too short
Sorry, that was Shannon
DeleteTwo stars:
Deletemany good words and phrases.
A very nice story
One wish
Too short...........
By: Yi Xuan
A BURGLARY THAT WAS FOILED
ReplyDelete“Sshhhhh!”John whispered to Max.“Keep quiet or someone will hear us!” John and Max were best friends and they were burglars.Tonight,as usual,Max and John met at Clementi and started to carry out their plan.They found a very big mansion and decided to break into it as no one was inside. They had just finished National Service and were experts at climbing walls and running.
Max grinned from ear to ear as he was always very lucky and was able to steal a lot of things.The duo skilfully climbed over the fence and barged into the house.They quickly started to rummage through cupboards and shelves. John grabbed a handful of jewellery while Max was busy taking some gold coins and stacks of notes.They stuffed the loot into a big black sack.Both of them were thinking of how they should spend the gold.
Fortunately, a lady, who was the neighbour of the owner of the mansion, saw them stealing and immediately called the police.Soon,just as Max and John were about to escape, the policemen arrived.Max and John panicked.They dropped their loot like a bag of hot potato and took to their heels.The policemen chased after them in hot pursuit.
Finally, the policemen besieged the two of them and arrested them.Max and John were sentenced to three years in jail and had to pay a fine of up to three thousand dollars. Max and John were extremely ashamed and remorseful of their actions.They vowed to turn over a new leaf and never to steal other people’s things or belongings again.
Can you focus more on developing your “problem”? You jumped so soon to talking about the ending. Spend more time talking about how the break-in happened. How did John and Max manage to break into the house? What did they steal? How did they feel after doing so? What did they plan to do with the stash they got?
Two stars:
Delete1.It is long.
2.Quite interesting
One wish:
1.Do not have too much phrases
From, Samuel.
Deletetwo stars:
DeleteQuite long,
Very nice ending and starting
one wish:
Can you please explain about the middle part? That is the part that I am very confused.
By: Yi Xuan
A BURGLARY THAT IS FOILED
ReplyDeleteHooting of owls broke the dead silence of the night.The clock had struck twelve. It was past midnight.the moon was starting to give way to sun.Suddenly, a man in black came lurking around a private property……..
He wore a black mask like the batman out of the comics,strong and fierce. He arrived here in a black car that was hidden in the black night sky and beneath the trees. He looked very suspicious. Out of the blue, a another man in black came in an identical black car.
“This is the place. The perfect place. It is beautifully furnished and strongly built. This family must be as rich as millionaires.” said the first man, Sam.
“ Yes. But this family here is very careless. They did not even care to lock the door nor close the windows!” said the second man, Tom while twisting the door knob then flinging open the door.
Sam and Tom looked into the window that was not closed and saw huge wads of money. Opposite the room there were the owners the apartment, sleeping sweetly and soundly in their room on the opposite side from where the burglars were.
“ When I count to three, I want you, Sam, to climb into the room from the window while I go into the room from the door.” said Tom. “But why me ?”Sam asked.”Because you’re once an acrobat,duh!”Tom replied wryly.
As the security guard, Ms Lynn, was walking to check the area, she spotted the two suspicious men trying to climb into the house. “Stop thieves!”shouted Ms Lynn.
Neighbours came out of their houses. Some of them gave chase while some of them dialled for the police.For the rest of them,they just record the incident.
The burglars heard the commotion and ran out of the house they were so shocked that they dropped their sacks of valubles and bolted away as fast as the wind.Luckily, the police arrived just in time. The burglars were in hot pursuit.The police and started to giving chase. They managed to catch the criminals . Everyone heaved a sigh of relief and said “This burglary is finally foiled.”
~Samuel,Shanice,Yna,Yee Jie.~
two stars:
Delete1. Stories is very long
2. very interesting
One wish:
Do not use to much Singlish
By Yi Xuan